What if we as mom’s, parents, guardians, and caregivers gave ourselves a break? What would that look like? How would that feel?
When you figure it out, let me know…
Because I majorly sucked at the mom thing this week.
That’s what happens when we try to do it all. We hold ourselves to these ridiculous expectations and then feel like a failure when we don’t meet them.
“Saying yes all the time won’t make me Wonder Woman, it will make me a worn out woman.” – Lisa Terkeurst
Show me a perfect mom, and…well, you can’t.
It all started with a major work project.
Suddenly, roles were reversed, and I was leaving the house at the crack of dawn while the hubs was playing Mr. Mom. Sounds like a vacation, right?!
In comes the guilt.
- Missing the first Awards Program in forever….
- Receiving that dreaded “sick call” when I’m an hour away and can do nothing about it…
- Missing an important birthday party invite until the last minute….
You name it, it happened.
And I stressed.
But guess what. We made it. We all made it to the end of the week in one piece. Nobody died. Nobody needs therapy. (As far as I know) And nobody hates me.
In fact, we all learned how to pull together and do our part. Because that’s what we do as families. We’re a team. We work together and make it all happen.
And when one person changes positions, we adjust. We cover for each other. Fill in the gaps.
It doesn’t make us bad parents. It makes us good parents.
We are teaching our children that life doesn’t always go as planned. It’s not the same every day. Just because mom usually does the morning thing, school drop off, and daily emergencies doesn’t mean dad can’t do it too! And apparently he’s not terrible at it, because they made it to school even earlier than usual. I have no idea what they were wearing or if their hair was combed…but who even cares?!
They need to know that they may walk into a college class that will rock their world. They need to know a boss may throw things at them they weren’t expecting and ask them to do the “impossible.” They need to know that they have to stay flexible and go with the flow. Because that.is.life.
The bottom line is this. We have to stop beating ourselves up over this stuff. We are not teaching our children anything by being there at their every beck and call.
That missed awards program? The boys loved having their dad there for a change. It was special. He was able to meet friends and experience the crazy. And bless him for sending me pictures!
That sick phone call that made me feel like the worst mom ever? Let’s just say “miraculous recovery” when he realized nobody was coming to get him. Lunch sitting next to his sweet teacher certainly helped. Praise!
That missed birthday party invite? It was ok! The mom understood. She showed grace! He made it to the party. It was fun!
So instead of trying to do it all, be the perfect parent, and win at everything…let’s try being “real.” Because “real” is going to teach our kids the most about life. “Real” is going to keep them grounded. “Real” is going to make them awesome.
And because “real” is really all we can do and survive.
When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the rock that is higher than I. Psalm 61:2